“Blast, Asha, I didn't think you'd be bathing!”
Elene giggles from his left side and returns to brushing a nasty snarl out of her hair. “What else would she be doing in a lavatory?”
“I figured you both would be doing each other's hair or something! Nanda let me in!”
I smile at him and draw the curtain partway across the bath. My hand leaves bubbles on the cloth. “Is this better?”
He sighs. “That's not the point, Asha.”
“Reid, you have already seen me naked.”
“That's even less the point!” Elene and I both find his irritation adorable.
“What did you two want me for, anyway?” he asks, edging back toward the main door and away from me. I finish washing and stand up, shivering as water runs down my skin. Like I've been swimming. Elene's mind flashes to her hometown, and the diving she did with her family to maintain the fish farm. She prefers showers. I only shower when I need to focus. Baths are more familiar.
“We're going dancing, and think you should come along.”
Reid sighs at Elene. “I knew it. You're only cute so you can get away with being openly sadistic.”
I wring out my braid and shake to get rid of some of the excess water coating me. “We want you along as company. I am teaching Elene how to dance.”
“Dance?” His voice is unconvincingly flat. I catch a brief flash of interest from him before I am shut out again. Now that he knows I can read him, he has gotten better at preventing me from doing it for long. I asked Desmond the other day why Reid could shut me out but he could not, and he told me it is because other empaths can feel when they are being read. All Desmond can do is guess. It made me feel very sorry for him.
“Yes! I was given a set of dancing pants from one of the refugees, and Elene wants to know what sort of dance they are for.”
She gives him a wicked grin. “You are going to appreciate these pants, Reid.”
“Pants?” He blinks, clearly off his guard. “Girls, you dragged me all the way over here to talk about pants?” He taps at his wristband.
I sigh and peek around the curtain. “Would you have come if we had asked you to go dancing in the message?”
He glowers at me.
“And are you going to come now?” Elene giggles at him.
“Well, I am already here,” he grumbles.
I step out from the bathtub, and Elene hands me my towel wordlessly. As I am drying off, she grabs Reid by the arm. “Let's go relax in the common room while she finishes getting ready, shall we?” He is escorted from the room, still complaining under his breath. Both of them know the only reason she suggested it is because she doesn't want Reid seeing me getting dressed. Only Elene knows this is not a modesty issue—she genuinely does not mind if he is around while I am not dressed. She simply wants my outfit to be a surprise. I am not sure why she thinks it will cause such a stir, and am far from pleased at how amusing she finds my confusion.
Now that I am dry, I reach for the pants. They are dark blue, and the material feels like water under my fingers. The refugee who gave them to me chose them because they are the color of my eyes. For the first time, I do not feel ashamed to have been born with blue ones. I step into the pants and let the cloth flow against my skin as I position the cuffs at my ankles and secure the tie at my waist. I don't feel any warmer—the sides of the pant legs are open from ankle to hip-bone, so air flows freely against my skin. The cloth shimmers slightly in the light and reminds me of my mother. I'd never been allowed my own pair by my father. He said I didn't deserve them, but she had taught me how to dance anyway. The simple white halter top Elene gave me as a present today goes well with the color of the pants and my skin. The styles do not clash as I feared they would.
I step out into the hall and move to find Elene and Reid. They are resting on the cushions, watching a feed. Elene smiles when she sees me and nudges Reid in the shoulder. When he looks up at me, his face becomes carefully blank.
“Who am I supposed to blame for you owning those?” His eyes drain my confidence away.
“Do you not like them?”
There is a pause. Elene is watching us both carefully. Reid licks his lips and refuses to meet my eyes. “They look good on you.”
Neither of us expected that answer. Elene grins widely at him, and I feel exposed. Feeling attractive also makes me feel suddenly vulnerable. For a brief moment, I comprehend modesty.
Elene chooses this moment to head for the door, giving me a minute to recenter myself. Reid follows her briskly, but falls back near me when I join them on the path outside.
“Are we going to be without Seamus and Bastian tonight?” he asks conversationally. He does not ask about Nanda. Word must have gotten around that he is still acting strangely.
I nod. “Bastian is helping Diane search for her parents, and Seamus is at the Capitol again.”
Reid shakes his head. “I am not sure you should be encouraging Diane. She needs to come to terms with the fact that she may never see her family again.”
“If your little brother and sister were stranded somewhere in space, would you stop searching before you had absolute proof they were dead?” Elene's voice sounds tight. She is an only child, but we have been living in contact with Diane's grief for so long that it has become our own. Tears well in our eyes, and we blink them away quickly.
He doesn't answer, but he doesn't push the issue. I assume he is thinking of his sister. When we spoke about her a few days ago, he made it sound as though he would have done anything for her. Because of this, I cannot see how he would not be able to relate to Diane now. All three of us are silent until we arrive at the campus club. Music drifts gently out the door, and the air inside looks flooded with light and movement.
“Tell me again why we are here?” Reid groans, staring at the open archway.
“It is Midbaran night!” I reply. “Midbaran music is the most like what I grew up dancing to.”
“That explains a lot,” he mutters, but before I can ask what he means, Elene shoves us both through the doorway. Instantly I am bombarded by people in sight and smell and mind, but classes and the camps have prepared me, so I am able to remain myself without closing down. Elene rubs my back and smiles proudly down at me—she had been worried this would be too much, even after the refugees. I look to my right and see Reid watching me intently.
“What?”
“I'm preparing myself, just in case. If you faint again, I mean, to catch you this time.” When Elene laughs at him, he rolls his eyes and pushes forward toward a table. I follow him uncertainly, unused to being around this many people my own age. As I walk toward him, I look around the building. The tables are near the bar, where those who drink could get alcohol. I have never had any, because Nanda has always been sure it would be a bad idea for someone so easily scattered to become intoxicated. Maybe tonight I can finally try some. To the left there is a black tile floor. On the back wall the Midbaran band is playing, and the students are dancing on the tile. The lights are strangely colored, and the walls are covered with monitor panels. The entire space makes my eyes throb.
I study the dance floor and wonder aloud. “But how can there be an audience if there is no place to stand out?” The band is on the raised dias, but they should be off in a corner. Music is for hearing, not seeing. This planet makes no sense.
Reid chuckles softly. “Asha, I promise you, the instant you start dancing wearing those pants, you'll find out.”
I sigh and turn to Elene. “Will you be able to learn in here?” They had done something to the instruments to make them louder than they should be.
She smiles at me. “With a mind like yours? Definitely. Let's go.” She grabs me by the arm and hauls me into the thick of the crowd. We find a place near the center, but still in clear sight of Reid, and pause. She is wondering what I am going to do now, but before I teach her anything I am going to have to get a feel for the beat. As one, we both close our eyes.
It is easier to shut the people out now. I focus in on the beat, feeling it pulse in my stomach as a result of whatever they have done to make it louder. This song is slow, steady. Good for her to learn on. I kick my shoes off carelessly, and feel the tile of the floor amplify as Elene becomes barefoot, as well. Someone bumps into us, but we ignore them and focus back in on the beat. Something is wrong, and Elene wants to know what. The music is so different. The beats are so familiar, and the instruments, too, but something has been twisted and the complete sound is so different than what I am used to. She reminds me that I told her a beat is all we would need.
All of the sudden the pace of the music deepens, the accompanying flute music dropping an octave, and I see the dance. I begin moving my hips gently to the beat, swaying with the tempo. After a moment, Elene follows. I move to stand directly in front of her, and we rock back and forth together. I take her through all the basic moves, teaching her how to slide her hips, how to roll, drop, and circle in place. By the end of the song, she does them all flawlessly, and the dance floor is clearing as people press back to give us space, to see. Several other empaths sift through our minds carefully, learning from us both, but trying not to distract. The room is growing hot.
Next I teach her how to move her upper body. My eyes are still shut, but I can see us both in the minds of the others. The lights are making us both sweat, and our bare skin shines slightly. To me, it feels sticky, but several of the observers find it alluring. No. Eyes shut. Mind on the music. Combine it now, Elene. Do like my mother used to tell me and ripple like cloth in water. More eyes on us now, and the music and the lights make our movements beautiful. The next song ends, and I open my eyes and turn to her. We're both panting with the effort it has taken to teach and learn in this fashion. Her chest is heaving underneath the thin material of her shirt.
She gestures around us. We are now the only ones dancing.
“See? What did I tell you about those pants?”
I keep my eyes off the crowd, but I do spare a glance at Reid. He is sitting at the table. Drink nearby, forgotten. Eyes on me. My heart jolts.
“Ready for a real dance?” I smile, shutting the people back out and focusing on the beat. Elene nods happily and watches me perform the first few motions so I can remember the others. I am taking steps now, and the cloth of the pants is sliding over my skin, sending cool air over my bare outer thighs. The material captures the light and glistens. The song is slow, so my movements are taught, unhurried, but I keep them as smooth as possible. Elene watches me, feels me, for a moment, and then joins back in. We face each other this time, and she mirrors me. The pace picks up, and we begin to travel around the dance floor with enough speed to make my braid sway back and forth against my back.
When the song is over and Elene and I have spun to a stop, the assembled mass of students watching us begins to cheer and clap. Elene's face is flushed from exertion, and I am desperately thirsty. Several people ask us to dance one more time, but we both stumble off the dance floor, slightly weak-kneed, and sit back at the table with Reid.
“What do you think, Reid,” Elene giggles. “Don't you just love those pants?”
He frowns at me. “Yes, about as much as every other person you just performed to does.”
I blink at him in confusion. “What do you mean?”
“What the fuck do you think you were doing up there?” he snaps.
“I—“ I begin, but he continues.
“I'm not pleased you dragged me along to sit here and watch you make a spectacle of yourself in front of fifty or so hormonal students. Next time you feel like playing to a crowd, leave me out of it.”
Anger strikes at my chest and makes it difficult to breathe, but I manage to choke two words out in reply. “Fuck you!” Both Reid and Elene stare at me in shock, and I take this time to regain control of my voice.
“I wanted you along because I like you! And, I was hoping you would forget how boring you are and actually dance with me tonight instead of lurking in a corner making snide comments and feeling secretly superior because everything I do is beneath you!”
He stares at me, mouth slightly open. Tears sting my eyes as I force out one final sentence.
“Next time you want to be a judgemental asshole, stay at home and leave me alone. I am sick of this, Reid!” With that, I turn on my heel and storm off toward the bar. I half-expect Elene to follow, but to my surprise she decides to stay and talk with Reid. She wants to get him to explain to her why he has been so cruel to me recently, but to do that she knows she'll have to shut me out for a while. I tell her that I will be fine on my own, but that she is probably wasting her time. I catch a brief flicker of disappointment from her before she is gone, and am plunged suddenly into guilt. I am being unfair, now.
I sit at the bar and look at the monitor panel before me that shows all the drinks the bartender can make, trying to figure out what sort of alcohol I would possibly like. Everything the people around me are drinking tastes too bitter, and I doubt any of it would make me any less thirsty. I'm in the process of giving the list a third look when Keven appears behind me. He places a hand on either of my shoulders. They feel warm and dry against my bare skin.
“This is the last place I expected to see you, Asha!” He smiles down at me when I tilt my head back to look up at him.
“I have been here for a while.”
“Oh, I know. I was watching you dance. I meant at the bar. Are you thinking about ordering something?” His hands have not moved.
“I do not know what to get,” I admit. He grins and leans down so his face is directly next to mine, and we peer at the menu together. When he speaks again, his breath tickles my ear, and his fingers rub gently against my right shoulder.
“You would probably like one of these blended drinks,” he says to my neck, pointing with his still hand on the opposite shoulder. I am suddenly surrounded by his scent. “They make them with fruit juice and ice, so they are nice and cool.”
“That does sound good.”
He orders for me and takes a seat next to me, spinning my chair so I face him. “This is a new look for you.”
I rub at my scar absently and try not to count his freckles. He has moved away from me, but I can still smell him, and my hands and ear are cold where he was touching me. “The pants were a present from the Midbarans, and the top was a present from Elene.”
“Well, both parties knew what they were doing. Asha, you look absolutely astounding in those clothes.” He taps me under the chin and grins down at me. His thoughts are completely unguarded, and as he looks me in the eyes he is wondering if I am wearing underwear this time around. I realize with dismay that I forgot to put any on before getting dressed and drop my eyes to the counter. He is better at reading body language than I am, and so knows what this means instantly. He is about to say something when my drink arrives. As the bartender sets it down before me, he changes his mind and spins us both back to the counter.
“Tell me what you think!” He pushes me forward slightly and runs his hand down my back, resting it at the hemline of my shirt. I shiver as I reach for the drink. The light reflects off the glass as I drag it toward me, and I am momentarily blinded. Everything is too bright. I am trying to breathe air but all I inhale is his smell and instead of clearing my head it makes me dizzier. I drink too quickly, and my skin grows hot. Half the drink has disappeared before I realize I need to stop.
“Slow down, Asha!” he laughs, hand running idly against the hem of my shirtback. “If you're not careful, it's gonna hit you hard!”
“I—I am a little dizzy,” I stammer, starting to fall. He catches me with one arm and pulls me against him.
“You fall into me every time we meet, you know that?” His hand is against my stomach now, and his breath is back in my ear.
“How much alcohol was in there?” I close my eyes to shut out the light, but it just makes his smell stronger.
“Enough, apparently. Come on, let's get you someplace where you won't hurt yourself if you fall over.” He stands me up and walks me before him, arms guiding me, sliding against my stomach and up my arm. My skin grows hotter, and my breathing is too shallow. Something is wrong, but Keven is acting like everything is normal, so it must be. I've never had alcohol before, after all, so this feeling could be typical.
He takes a seat in a booth at the far wall, out of sight of the dance floor. It is dark inside, and I am granted a brief respite from the light. Instead of sitting me next to him, he pulls me down into his lap.
“I don't want you falling over,” he murmers, pushing my braid out of the way. “I'll keep you sitting up until you feel better.” At this, his lips brush against my neck, and all the tension wilts from my body. I fall back against him, eyes drooping shut. “Wha—?“
He moves his mouth against my ear, and his breath kindles a frantic sensation in the pit of my stomach. “I loved watching you dance, you know.” His mind focuses on me and Elene up against one another, curving as I taught her how to move her hips and lower body. His memory is tinged with a sensation mine is not. He took something from the scene that I did not and it left him frantic so now he is making me see it too.
“Keven—“ I try to speak, but this time he sinks his teeth lightly into my shoulder, and the sentence disappears into an animal noise. My noise. The frantic sensation in my stomach increases its ferocity. It tells me to pounce on him, to bite him back and rip into his clothing, but his smell and the heat keep me useless. My head rolls back into his shoulder, and he responds by running his tongue along my neck. Everything crumbles.
Hands again, sliding against skin. My hands, my skin, so why does it feel so different? No. His hands, my skin. I feel soft. I feel like the cloth of the pants under his rough fingers, and he wants to know if my skin is that soft everywhere. Fingers run along my face, down my arms, spine, stomach. They skip along my outer thigh like leaves in a storm but they are warm, not brittle. My eyes won't open. I can't see-hear-speak, just smell and feel. He talks, and his voice pulses within me somewhere dark.
“You're so sexy, Asha.” My ear is warm, wet. Exclaiming sensation. His mouth has taken it in. “I want you to feel how sexy you are to me.” Pain flares against my outer thigh but there is pleasure coming from my neck how can teeth feel good but nails bad everything is too warm to think.
Hand with aching slowness. Sliding down my stomach, into pants. Teases my thighs for a moment and then shifts my legs apart, seeking—
A girl groans again. No. Me. The sound makes me smug. No.
A mind, seeking mine. I try to latch on, but it slips away as—
More groaning. The tongue is back at my neck, in a confusing counterpoint. But the mind is still there, if I could only—
No.
Footsteps now, and a cold stop.
“Keven, what the fuck are you doing?” Cold words. I'm so warm, so thirsty, I need the cold but I can't open my eyes because the hands won't stop moving.
“Reid! Fun trivia. Did you know she's not wearing any underwear?” Something in the words I don't like. My eyes slide open. Reid.
No.
“Let her go, Keven.”
“Why? It's clear she's enjoying herself.”
“It's clear you've seeded her. She can't even stand on her own.”
“That just means I know what I am doing.”
No. Anger now. Confusing. I try to stand, but he comes with me. The hands keep moving. Frantic still. He presses me back against him and I am afraid together we will melt it's too hot—
“Keven.”
“Reid, come on! How can you expect me to say no to this? Look, and tell me you wouldn't take this if you had the chance!” Hands slide, fingers work. I crumple and groan my knees are useless why can't I stand—Reid!
I latch onto his mind. Miss.
My eyes open and I stare at him and try to speak but the only thing that comes out is the animal. No! I stumble, and Keven's hands shift to hold me up.
A thought comes, clear. Certain. Can't be mine. Too much rage. Duck.
What?
Duck.
I do less than that. I slide through his arms onto the floor and feel pain overtake my jaw as Reid's fist contacts Keven's face.
Someone screams who sounds like me. Minds rush in at once, wondering, seeking, and I almost lose myself until I feel someone familiar. Elene! I reach out in desperation and let her save me from oblivion.
Asha hits the floor so hard it echoes, and for a terrible moment I am convinced I heard her skull crack against the surfacing, but it is Reid, kicking Keven in the face as hard as he can before they are pulled too far apart to do more damage to one another. The sight of Asha crumpled at their feet is enough to make me run across the room, shoving anyone out of the way who does not dodge quickly enough. Stupid. Why did I cut her off in a public place? Stupid! Leaving her alone like that! Seamus is too far away to help, and Bastian is too busy. It was up to me and I let her down and now she may be sick!
No, she's not sick. I am absolutely certain. She's not sick, she's been seeded, and has taken refuge. Didn't know what else to do. No one taught her what to do because of course it never happens and now she is on the floor and Reid is screaming, struggling, spit flying, trying to get at Keven.
“What did you do to her! What did you do to her!”
Keven is bleeding too hard to speak. He needs to get to a cauterizer, but no one is going to let him out of the room before we know what happened.
“Someone message one of the hall nurses!” I yell, and see a nearby student turn his attention to his wristband. Reid is still screaming.
“You bastard! I'll kill you! If you hurt her at all, I'll kill you!”
Keven chokes and spits a mouthful of blood onto the floor.
“Lean forward,” I tell him. “Let it run out your nose until the nurse gets here.”
He listens, and soon his shirt is stained dark red. Blood. He'll be fine. Need to get Reid calmed down. His voice is growing hoarse, and the three third-years holding him back are having trouble maintaining their grip.
“Reid!”
He looks up at me, chest heaving.
“Elene! Elene, she collapsed! I told her to get out of the way and she just collapsed!” He's getting tired now. A familiar face, sapping him of his will to fight. I step forward and touch him on the shoulder, and he sags against his captors.
“Reid, she's fine.”
“How can you say that?” His voice catches. “What if we messed her up? Why did we leave her alone? She's just lying there!”
“No, no. Reid, listen.” I step forward and throw my arms around him. The third-years step back and walk over to attend to Keven, who is now slumped against the division between a pair of booths. I give Reid a squeeze and force him to look down at me.
“She's fine. She's with me. I'll explain later. But if you want her to wake up, you're going to have to get her out of this mess of people.”
Reid looks around. “But what about Keven?”
I shake my head. “I'll deal with all this here. Once he's stopped bleeding, I'll need to go find Desmond and tell him what happened right away. So you have to get her out of here.”
A voice calls from the other end of the bar. “Another one down over here!”
My head jerks up. A thin blonde is lying in a heap near the dance floor. “Is she an empath? Does anyone know?”
The voice replies. “Yes, she is!”
Oh, no. She's seeding the others. I don't know when the empath fell, but I don't want to take my chances. “Reid, you have to get her out of here now, or more of us are going to start dropping. If anyone asks what you are doing, don't say a word. You're good at that.”
He nods and walks over to Asha's crumpled body, picking her up effortlessly. The back of his shirt is stained with sweat from his attempts to deprive Keven of his nose. The third-years look at him, start to speak, see me, and think better of it. Good. They trust me, at least. This will make things easier. Now to get this sorted out as soon as possible so I can get back to As—
Warm. Cold air on my face, warm arms holding me. I do not want to open my eyes because these arms feel safe. This mind feels safe. Familiar, but not.
Reid. Why am I reading him?
“You're awake,” he says gruffly. Worried about me. Waiting for me to come back. Now that he knows I am here, he shuts down again, but I do not care because he is warm. I close my eyes again and lean into his chest.
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Doing that to Keven's face.” His chest shakes as he chuckles at me. My head hurts. The rhythm of his walk is so relaxi—
“Asha?” Elene's voice. I open my eyes and am in the living room of Hanakawa. New clothes. Damp rag wiping my face. Reid hands me a mug of tea. It sloshes in the mug as my hands barely manage to keep hold.
“Asha, honey, I have to go talk to Desmond. Are you feeling okay?”
“Tired.” I don't remember telling my voice to speak, but neither of them are with me, so she has to talk to me aloud.
“We couldn't get you to wake up until both of us had shut you out,” Reid explains, guessing my thoughts. I must have done something to give myself away.
“If you're tired, why don't we put you in bed? Then I will go see Desmond, and Reid will go ho—“
“No!” I yell loudly enough to startle them both.
“No?” Reid asks.
“I do not want to be alone. You cannot shut me out and then leave me alone.”
Elene rubs my shoulder. “Honey, I have to go talk to Desmond.”
“Then Reid will stay with me!” The tea mug in my hands clatters to the floor.
“Asha...” Reid starts to shake his head, but Elene gives him a piercing look.
“After everything you told me tonight, Reid, and after what we let her get herself into, you are not saying no.”
“What am I supposed to do, lie with her?”
“If it gets her to sleep? Yes!”
“Nanda will murder me,” he mutters.
At these words, I start to cry. Elene lunges forward to hug me, bare feet stepping carelessly in the spilled tea. “Nonono, honey, no. Don't cry. Come on. Let's get you to bed.” She gives Reid a pointed look. “Well, I can't carry her!”
He sighs and gathers me up in his arms, carefully side-stepping the pool of tea. I do my best to stop crying.
Our room is home-night black. Elene has done something to the curtains. Reid places me on the bed and starts to walk away, but I grab him by the sleeve.
He sighs again. “Asha, I am not going to—“
“Reid!” Elene snaps. “It's not like you're going to be alone with her! I'll be in here as soon as I get back from talking to Desmond.”
“Yes, that makes it far less awkward.”
I slide under the blankets. The feel of the sheets against my skin makes me cry again because it feels too much like the cloth of the pants. He curses under his breath and moves to join me. I press my face into his chest, and he throws an arm around me carefully. He smells strongly of sweat.
Elene walks from the room and we lie together in silence. Every muscle in his body is tense, but I am captivated by his scent. I move my nose to his neck and exhale softly. He twitches, but stays perfectly still. The frantic feeling is returning with each inhale. I wonder how he tastes. I give his neck a small lick.
“Asha, stop.”
I grab at his shoulder with one hand. “No. You don't understand. I feel...”
He puts his fingers against my mouth. “No. Lingering effects from the seeding.”
“But I would not...I would not care if it were you. Keven was wrong. You are right.” I breathe on his neck again, and he pulls away.
“Regardless, this is wrong. It doesn't matter what I want or how I feel, I am not taking advantage of you right after you were seeded. Now lie down with me and go to sleep, or I am leaving.”
I move in against his chest again, but he shakes his head. “No, put your back to me. That will make it easier.”
“I am sorry you have to do this.”
He chuckles softly. “What, you think this is a chore? Asha...”
His voice trails off, but his arms wrap around me tightly and he buries his face in my hair.
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